old luv...

dis afternoon went and watch chinese stage show, then just now watched cirque du soleil...
not as exciting as watching the real ting la of cuz...
anywayz...tis afternoon hor..i was a bit left out..
i saw soo many couples holding hands going for the show...
my niece and her partner, my uncle and my aunt..me and myself *sobz*
i was like wondering...where is my partner's hand for me to hold?
so sad...seeing my niece and bernad so happy, teasing one another made me a lil jles??
its normal...when i go out wif my partner its owayz like tat as well..its wat couples do when they go out...
even my uncle and aunt oso still 'sa fa cheong' when they go out..
like just now..after the show, denise was like asking wat shd we eat for lunch...then bernad was like hamburger hamburger...then my uncle was like larfing larfing along and my aunt kept quiet...then he was like pushing my aunt in those 'teh teh' way asking if she wanted to eat hamburger..u noe wat i mean? its like he noes my aunt doesnt wanna eat tat but yet he still teases her wif it...its nice to see tat amongst them..
i cant help but not tink about tat..every one were paired up but me...how sad is tat??
i wan someone to hold each time i go out...i wan someone to tease me and make me smile again...i wan someone to drag me to places i dun wanna do or make me do tings i do not desire..
im depressed lately..dunno for wat....then i realise tat someting or someone is more important then i am...its like having fun wif someone else is more important then spending some time alone wif me...
its like you'd rather go out for drinks wif ure frenz and leave the gal alone without asking if she wants to come along...
what happen to the 2 person thing? when did it became a one person ting or a group ting?
im really really upset....i couldnt make myself do tings im suppose to...
ive been putting tings aside and try to free myself from tis nightmare..
noting is about me anymore..its all about u now...
sigh...tis sorta tings oni happens to me huh..why ah?
enough said la...pretty upset because tomolo is suppose to be a public holiday..the queen's bday...buti still have uni...so watever la..not looking forward to going tomolo..
i hope for time to go by faster...i tink i'd call to book my flight back on tuesday...
i dun tink im ready to work even if i really need to..
i wanna go back and hopefully my parents approve of tat..
tis place makes me tink too much about stuff im not suppose to...
i am desperate for a holiday...i wanna go back to melaka...i miss it soo much..haven been going there for omost 2 years plus...ever since my grandma passed away things changed...
im really upset cuz just now i had a flash back of the times when my grandparents were still alive...i saw my grandma waiting outside the house for us to arrive in melaka...and my grandpa watching the tv inside...
im depressed...i really really am...but im glad tings are going smoothly..well most of it tat is...i miss you so much....cant u tell?