strength and courage

Well I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain
To hell with my pride
Let it fall like rain, from my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry.....

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am totally crazy for this portion of the song by keith urban called "tonite i wanna cry"...
it resembles a part of me tats why....a song so strong yet so gentle!! luv it!!
haven been crying lately....i guess its a good ting, i have ppl in my life tat constantly make me smile, make me larf and make me realise that life is more than just sorrows and tears...

i spoke to one of my on9 frenz about my current/future/untold relationship..
its sorta in a mess at the moment, i dunno where im heading or which direction to take...
as i have stated in a few entries back, i gave out my 2nd rejection to the same person and ive been told not to be such a biatch to put a high price tag on myself..
i repeated myself by saying I DIDNT DO TAT!
well, maybe i dunno wat rejection feels like.i dun wanna noe wat it feels like...
i dun wanna be played out by anyone but really, i din do it on purpose...i have my explanations :)

had a great swim earlier this afternoon...very proud of myself for doing so many laps :D
pat pat...i luv the butterfly stroke but boy is it tiring! 4 laps and i was a gonner....
spent the rest of the day doing my french manicure :P its not perfect cuz i keep hitting my nails and scratching it wif my other nails and i cant be bothered redoing it over and over again..
its just annoying tat it gets ruin so quick and takes ages to dry ><"

oh oh, those who are in ozzieland, make sure u watch the new show on ten called 'taken out'...its a reality show where 30 single ladies get to have their say on 1 single man..
and at the end, the guy gets to choose who he wants to go on a date wif...interesting...
there's tis guy, his name is lee...GORGEOUS! hot bod hot smile hot everyting hahaha...
i'll leave my lite on anytime for him hahahahaha....

i tink im gonna fall sick pretty soon cuz im having the 'chillz' and its not a good sign..maybe cuz tis morning hor, i didnt wear a jacket when i was out in the cold hanging my cousin's clothes on the line..i just stood there wif a super thin spaghetti striped singlet and my short pants...
i just couldnt drag myself out of bed cuz it was raining and the sky was dark and tats like the best time to sleep...
aunt woke me up to tell me she's going out so i pulled myself out of bed and left the electric blankie on cuz i wanted to crawl back to bed....
put her washings in the machine and came back up...tried sleeeping back but couldnt so turned on the comp....turned the music on and crawl back to sleep.....but failed..
just stared at the wall ><"
when it was time to hang the clothes, i just walked out of the house and it was freezing...so chances of me catching a cold was like 101%....sigh, fall sick then no one take care of me..damm sien :(

was chatting wif how ee just now and she introduced me to this website http://www.alaricemusic.com
didnt browse tru everyting..just listened to the song titled 'away'...not bad not bad...
will listen to more of her when i find the time to :D thanx babe....mwah mwah!
ps: DO NOT CALL ME MAMASAN ..... GRRRRR .....
pps: its oredi bad enuf tat K calls me tat ><"