all ure good for is running away

ure faced wif a bump on the road...do u go ova it or do u take another route?
u are wif someone who is oredi in a relationship, u insist on being wif her because u cant live without her...
now she has eyes oni for the other person and left u heart broken..do u keep hanging on hoping tat one day she sees u or do u let go and move on wif life?

today is our one mth anniversary. im very happy to see him on webbie althou it was oni for a few minutes. i am not satisfied but at least i get to see him smile, blush and wave at me :)

i had an argument wif a fren. i felt cheated. betrayed of my loyalty. i do not deserve this kinda treatment. at least i now noe im not the oni one who feels the way i do. if she tinks im a bad fren for not spending time wif her despite my reasonings, then its just too bad. after all tat ive done, after all the time ive spent on her, and she still doesnt tink tats good enuf, then maybe its time to switch frenz. change of environment. she has the worse reasonings i will ever hear from frenz. oh well, if she tinks tat she's rite and tat ppl have to give in to her, then sorri to say, ive had it wif giving in. i shd noe how to say someting for myself instead of giving in all the time. its time to get my life back :) just hope she keeps in mind tat not everyone will stick by her 24/7, be there whenever she needs someone. everyone has their own probs to deal wif, own sorrows to drown in, own family to fullfil duties to and to obey. if its frenz vs parents, its obvious i am going for the parents. if i am a bad fren for obeying my parents, then who are u to even judge me. if one tink im giving excuses, then maybe one shd tink why is it tat ppl oways come up wif excuses.

im not giving in anymore. i am not at fault here. i will not say sorry neither will i beg for forgiveness :) no more, not unless i am at fault......

im sorri john :(

john is a 'fren'. someone i knew years ago. he was never once serious. he is a perv. a real one. but he's a guy and a guy is oways a perv. never once serious. i never once took his words seriously. oh well, i never tot he actually took me seriously. today he asked me to play a game of truth or dare. i wouldnt cuz i noe wat his dares are and they are ridiculous. then we ended up in an argument just cuz i din wan to play the stupid game wif him. he said tat i never gave in to any of his requests. wtf? who would? who would be dum enuf to actually do wat he says? here's the conversation we had. i told brodz about it and brodz got really angry n wanted to tok to john. brodz isnt in the conv...its just me and john. i omost broke down in tears when i read wat he said..

.yeah.na.done. says:
u're revelaing what we talked to ur friend?

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
brodie, my bf

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
he can noe wat we tok about

.yeah.na.done. says:
who gave u the permision to say whether he can know or not?? u've no respect for me at all! bye!

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
he is my bf,he can noe wat i tok wif other guys

.yeah.na.done. says:
i dun give a shit.. ur bf is ur bf's prob

.yeah.na.done. says:
telling what we were talking abt is totally unacceptable

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
why? its not like its a secret

.yeah.na.done. says:
so if i would to tell u a secret,it's gonna go to him

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
if its a secret it remains

.yeah.na.done. says:
like i would believe u now.

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
but wat is there to hide about tis

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
now tis is wat i call a fren! watver!!

.yeah.na.done. says:
yeap, the friend u rather he died

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
u never treated me like a fren so dun even start

.yeah.na.done. says:
i'm gonna give him a piece of my mind if he's asking for it

.yeah.na.done. says:
u want to tell him that? go ahead

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
tell him wat

.yeah.na.done. says:
ugh.. y do i even bother

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
does it have to be tis way

.yeah.na.done. says:
wat way?

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
THIS

.yeah.na.done. says:
u asking ur bf to come ask me to be nice to u?

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
no i dint

.yeah.na.done. says:
watever.. he still approached me anyway

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
ure still toking to him

.yeah.na.done. says:
there's nth to talk

.yeah.na.done. says:
i told him im not interested in talking to him

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
ok fine, u wont tok to me either

.yeah.na.done. says:
u know wat... ask him to come talk to me.. let's see how much he knows abt u

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
wat are u gonna do

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
tel him all the shITs about me huh

.yeah.na.done. says:
well he's ur bf... he should've known already, no?

.yeah.na.done. says:
i thought u might have already told him

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
noe about wat

.yeah.na.done. says:
like wat u described it as, "your shit"

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
those are all f-ing lies ok

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
dun u get it

.yeah.na.done. says:
so u've been lying to me?

.yeah.na.done. says:
or are u lying to me now by saying that they are lies

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
u were never once serious

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
how can i be honest wif u

.yeah.na.done. says:
ic... well it's fine then.

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
fine...very common word to say

.yeah.na.done. says:
u know wat

.yeah.na.done. says:
i've thoughts of destroying ur relationship

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
if ure gonna do it i cant stop u

.yeah.na.done. says:
if i really wanted to

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
i am in no power to do tat

.yeah.na.done. says:
but because i once thought u treated me as a friend

.yeah.na.done. says:
i wouldn't

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
if u really hate me tat much then u will do tat

.yeah.na.done. says:
the fact is i dun

.yeah.na.done. says:
yes, u've said the hardest words i've heard in my life

.yeah.na.done. says:
yes, u've not respected me, lied to me and acted selfishly towards me

.yeah.na.done. says:
in my opinion

.yeah.na.done. says:
but it's not enough to make me hate u

.yeah.na.done. says:
cause that's what friends do.. they forget and they move on

.yeah.na.done. says:
feel free to tell ur bf what i'm telling u now

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
i hope u mean wat u said

.yeah.na.done. says:
i am always true to my words

.yeah.na.done. says:
if u've never noticed at all

.yeah.na.done. says:
i've always sticked to my words

.yeah.na.done. says:
when i said i'll come visit u in perth

.yeah.na.done. says:
i did and i was almost there, but u bailed out

.yeah.na.done. says:
when i said i'll delete ur pics after viewing

.yeah.na.done. says:
i did

.yeah.na.done. says:
when i told u that u were hot

.yeah.na.done. says:
i meant it

.yeah.na.done. says:
anyway

.yeah.na.done. says:
dun worry

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
when u said u were coming i tot it was some sort of a joke

.yeah.na.done. says:
i won't bother u anymore

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
who would actually fly all the way

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
ppl say tings tat are stupid...

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
i never believed tat i was ever hot or watever

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
can u pls stop and hear me out

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
if ure a fren u wouldnt leave me like tat

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
im sorri for everyting tat i hv done

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
i never took u seriously because u didnt seem to be serious at all

.yeah.na.done. says:
that's me jezz..

.yeah.na.done. says:
my heart doesn't match my mouth

.yeah.na.done. says:
and yet i still controlled my words

.yeah.na.done. says:
and was careful with what i said

.yeah.na.done. says:
learn to do that urself.. u might not be so fortunate and do that to someone dear

:: duchess jezzie luvs his sexy ass :: says:
its oni u tat i do it to

.yeah.na.done. says:
well.. i guess i'm special in some way then

moral of the story is? i am a full hardcore biatch. i told brodie he should tink twice, maybe 3 times about me. im not a very nice person. i can do lots of tings to hurt ppl. i have hurt many many ppl truout my years of being alive. i never mean all of it. some were done out of rage and anger. i oways say i wont do it again but again and again i do, and ppl still dun take me seriously. they call me weak....well maybe i am. the weakest link :(

met brodz mum ova the webbie :) i chatted n webbie wif brodz for hours today. he was sooooo happy to see me on webbie. i really wish i didnt have to see him tru a screen. i wanna touch his face rite now :( he asked me to move in again. sigh.....i saw pagan's ass again today. omg, nitemare!! he oways does tat grrrr...stupid idiot. im getting my ears pierced when i go back :) prolly getting a small tattoo as well *yeepeee*

im like superbly happy for kelf. someting must have happened last nite at the party. he's like on cloud 999999999!! went to habib to get couple jewelz *piang*. engraving somemore. it was my idea damm it, how dare u get it b4 me LOL....im getting a pair of necklaces as well. it wont be a couple ting but im getting brodz one ;) i wan him to wear it and tink of me :D he bought me a white xmas teddy..omg, its turning BROWN cuz he keeps hugging it to sleep :( poor teddy hehehehe....i luv u baby :)

ending the relationship :(

just today alone, based on facebook alone, there were more than 5 ppl who ended their relationship. from being in a relationship to being single. at work tis morning, i went on fb as usual. i saw pagan online. it was unusual cuz he was suppose to be at work. his msg was pretty sad :( i chat wif him. for the first time ever, i saw his softer side. he oways buli me call me names etc. but tis morning, he was as soft as a kitty cat. he was having problems wif courtney, turns out courtney wasnt gonna move to perth anymore. tat was the shock of the morning. they love each other like crazy la, on the phone wif each other every time! tok nonstop lor omg.

he was super upset. it was like the end of the world for him. i was the first to noe and tat was pretty upsetting. not even brodie knew about it :( i haven seen tis side of pagan b4 lor ok. i felt soooo sad for him. he was crushed. badly crushed. i had to convince him, prevent him from tinking stupid. he told me tings tat i never tot he would. i mean, i hardly noe him and he oways buli me like crap. i msg brodie to ask him look out for him. stupid fella, woke up SUPER late. made me worri again. idiot oways make me worri oni sigh. i din wanna tell brodie about pagan cuz he said he hasnt told anyone yet. but brodie tot i was hiding smeting from him. wth....annoying. told him and so he knew about it. tried toking to courtney but she wasnt on.

spoke to her just now. noting's changing. she has her reasons for not moving. i support her. on her side :) but its pretty hurting for pagan at the same time. but i guess for this matter, family comes first! no doubt about tat. but then again, she ended the relationship :( i cant do much about it. ive done my part, i tried to change her mind but it didnt work. spoke to pagan about it and he's still upset and he's not stopping, not giving up. he wont take no for an answer, he's strong :)

blue eyed monster

im broke!!! i just took out rm500 4 days ago. all goneeeeee goneeeeee GONEEEEE. seriously no idea where all the money gone to. i didnt buy new clothes oso so i dunno money fly go where d.

today is 'gor tong' festival so make tong yuen as usual. tis year i got 6 colour. mum bought white pink n green but i made 3 colours into 6! muahaha. i added purple, yellow and blue to the bunch lol. i made 22 biji for kelf lolx. tradition said, if ure xx years old, u eat xx amount of tong yuen. i ate my 22 str8 away. wat do i get? noting, i get to be 22 years old. i asked my dad how many he wan and he say 60!! LOL..he really ate 60!!! mum couldnt stop larfing cz he really ate tat many. she one biji oso din eat cuz she dislike tong yuen not cuz of the colour cuz of its texture. she finds it hard to swallow. went to uncle bob's house to pray my grandparents. omg so sleeeeeepyyyyy!!!

went out wif tsy kelf and gosh the traffic was pethatic! parking even worse sien dou ah. from new wing we ended up in the old wing parking. sien sien. he bought the la senza teddy bear which was cuteeeeeee. i needed him to help me try on a tshirt cuz i bought a polo tshirt for baby and he said tat the size was wayyyy too small. ok i agreed cuz when i wore it it was baggy but too small for baby. so kelf become my model lolx. took xl lor eesh ><" went for yumcha at auntie annes lolx farny shit. then i went and get my contact lenses weeeee. got the blue saphire one :D both my eyes diff power so i had to buy like 2 sets of lenses. irritating! so decided to get non powered ones first :) omg do u noe how hard is it to put on contact lenses?? kelf being around made it worse!! cuz he was larfing and staring all the way. making fun of me la...idiot ><" i cried damm alot la. eyes all red and watery omg so hard!!! came home and tried. weee.....took me 10 minutes per eye damm it :(

ps: i tink i look like an alien aka blue eyed monster LOL.

very pissed wif bro rite now. argh, ruin my nite. grrrr. went out for dinner wif uncle mark n his family. no appetite to eat damm it.

baby went for his company xmas dinner party last nite tat i was suppose to attend, he took lisa instead. we sorta argued yet again yesterday about lisa. so upsetting. then it settled then the whole morning today i din get his sms. crap, someting wrong la. sms him din reply :( then oni he replied say he just woke up at 4PM!! geez. and his mum arrived :) so he was bz lor. just now he online just to tok to me. im making him move up north to work. better pay and everyting and he gets to be wif his mum. i dun wan history to repeat itself lor. i dun wan because of me, he is staying back. im so useles in convincing ppl arggh. mum first b4 gf rite? for him, its the other way. arggh, its good im not complaining but at this point in life, mum first la!! he say wanna start family wif me in it double argggh!!! BS toking damm it. i cant have someone put me ahead of their future. NO WAY!!!
tats the end, the more i convince baby, the more he tinks i wanna leave him so shardup first. tok later LOL...im his QUEEN and im MISS BOSS hahahahaha....

a letter from a lover...

melson is my ex, melson was someone i spent the last 5 years wif...
we had fun, we shared the tears, we enjoyed the larfz, we gained the trust, and now i have to let everything go because i lost the faith that i had in the relationship.
it is a waste, but the past 5 years was the 5 years that i would not regret...

yesterday nite i received a letter...it was subjected to 'dear'. i knew it was not gonna be someting for me to enjoy reading. true enuf, it was very upsetting. i couldnt let myself cry because i noe i wasnt suppose to. i have to be strong because i have let go of the relationship months ago. i cried when we tok about it the other nite. i couldnt stop myself because it was emotional and its not someting easy for me to do. i was emotionally disturbed!!!

the letter was written wif lots of tears. i could feel it. it was bout how we met, how hard it was for us to live together, how we cried, how we larfed and how we remained together for so long. it oso contain the trust issues and everyting tat i wanted to change. melson noes tat i won't go back to the life we had together because i have made my choice. it wasnt because of brodie, it wasnt because of anyone else. i made my choice based on what i feel and what i noe. things will never go back to the way it was because i have lost faith in it. i have lost the confidence i had in melson and the relationship. so what if melson changed? will it not be the same? why change oni after i threaten to split? why show me changes when we are no longer together? isnt all thats done because we are apart? i have said it b4, do someting for ureself and not because i have asked u to.

if u have changed, i am very proud for u have proven me wrong. but if u changed because u want me back then im sorri, i couldnt accept. anywayz...i wont go into too much detailed. its personal so i guess its oni for me to noe :)

feel like shit...

omg, i just went shopping in 1u wif tee yen and i spent rm350 on a single receipt. all thanx to buying shoes and clothes from padini which werent on sale ><" i bought a top for baby as well. i hope it fits. ok tee yen shops like crazy. i wish i would just spend like her. i can but i refuse? i have platinum cards to just swipe swipe swipe lor but i really feel bad using those cards cuz its not my money im using. i signed using my dad's card just cuz my mum pressurize me tis morning saying how my dad gave the china boy rm1k to go genting n melaka =.=" tats really stupid of my dad but oh well i cant do anyting. so mum has been asking me to ask dad for money for my shopping. i told her i have his card and i can just swipe as much as i want. and so i did, just now. i had cash but i just took the cash back and swipe card insteed.

came back and saw my dad doing his work. omg, my heart just sank down south la. my dad is working at home while his princess daughter is spending useless unnecessary money on stuff she oredi have plenty. i felt like slapping myself for using his money. but at the same time, how often do i get money from him? getting his card is like getting his money so ok lor, i sign lor. who ask my mum oways use cash cash cash LOL!!! oh well, i oredi spent it. now im wondering should i just pay him cash back and lie say my fren had no cash and i helped her sign and she returned me cash??? hmm......any headers??

i accused him

wat would u tink if ure partner sent a flirt out to someone? tats wat happened to me yesterday. i opened his page and i saw tat he sent out a flirt to someone on speeddate. my heart just drop! he told me that he will never find any other gals while im gone. wats tis now?

i went out wif kelf and how ee. i told him about it and this was the conversation over smses:

brod: 'oi behave'

me: 'i am behaving, unlike u i dun send flirts out to some other person'

brod: 'it was to u dun accuse me b4 u noe the truth FARK'

me: 'i didnt receive anyting from u, besides, i am insecure thats why im tinking like tat'

brod: 'how are u insecure? i shd be the one tht should be'

me: 'well, we oni got together recently and i had to leave perth. what u do there i dunno. i dun noe what's on ure mind'

brod: 'wanna noe wat i do everyday? i go to work i text u. at work i msg u. i go home n msg u. i tink about u 24/7. i didnt go anywhere wif other chix except for this weekend. i luv u and im waiting for u'

he was still very angry that i didnt trust him. i told him i had trust issues becuz ive been cheated on b4. he said tat he had trust issues as well but he doesnt have it wif me. omg, i can just fall down la. he is too good to be true dun u tink? i told him tat and he larfed. he wouldnt forgive me until i go back and check my speeddate account. he said one ting and i could just feel a big rock falling onto my shoulders.

me: 'baby pls forgive me, i dun mean to say tings like tat....'

brod:'see how i feel after my shower...'

everyting was settled and the nite was just so upsetting for me. i can't sleep without knowing he has forgiven me. it ended ok i suppose. went and did some tings wif kelf n how ee. dun tink i should mention wat's going on at the moment. its personal and its not my story to share :)

this morning, i was waiting for his sms at 6am. he oways sms me tat time cuz 7am was when he is at work. he didnt sms me :( but he did a bit later. he called me baby and i smiled. i had to ask if he forgived me and is he still angry about yesterday. he said tat he was not mad, n that he is in luv wif me tats why its hard to be mad at me. he claims im his forever :) b4 tat, he was a bit cold and hesitant towards me on the sms but after tat it was good...

i told him i was going out wif kelf. brodie said tat i keep hanging out wif him and he is upset. for some reason, i didnt feel angry. usually i would be angry cuz it seems like im being controlled to whom i can go out wif. insteed i felt happy because i noe now that if my partner is upset about me going out wif other guys, its cuz they wished it was them tat accompanied me. i now understand :) he asked me not to tell him if im going out wif other guys. he trust me tat im old enuf to noe what i am doing. sweet as....

everyday he sms me and ask me to go home to perth. a lil stress tinking about it cuz time is going soooo slowly. its like 2 more mths before i go back again. it feels like ive been here for a month oredi omg ><" he misssssssssssssssssssszzzzzzzzzzzz me lots. so do i la come on. not hearing his voice everyday oso torture oredi lor. wat more not seeing him huh?? no doubt tat the relationship just started. its oways spicy at the beginning and it oways gets milder as it goes on....why not keep the highness all the way? can we do it tis time? can i make it tru wif this guy?
im really hoping for him to come over next june. i wan him to meet my parents. all my past ex-es have met my parents without knowing what my relationship is wif my ex-es. if he does make it here, i will introduce him as my baby lol lol. mum noes tat he might come over. he can stay at my place but we cant go holidays together without someone else watching us. WTH?? oh well, tats not for another 1/2 year. who noes wats gonna happen then rite? oh well.

i wanna go shopping!!!! kelf bought everytig he wanted to get for his gf. now i wan to shopping!! my turn my turn hahahaha. went for movie today. watched 'd day the earth stood still'. oooo good movie!! another good movie is 'eagle eye' AWESOME ACTION ><" i overused my larfing quota again wif kelf. omg super farny la. from the moment we got in the car till the moment he dropped me off in front of my house. larf non stop omg =.=" one ting i larfed soooooo loud was this story about his mum:

'u noe how if u honk ppl while driving, ure honking the front car?? my mum is different. she honks at the car behind her LOL LOL!!!! if the car behind her is speeding, she honks at them...'

damm farny rite? where got such ting one? i came back and told my parents, omg i larf so loud my dad had to say 'eh dun larf like tat la, more ladylike can onot'. muahahaha....sowee pa....

andrea :(

Wat is wrong wif me. I have been sleeping for agez. Omg!! Came to office today and I slept rite after brekkie till 12pm just when how ee msged me. I refuse to go to the president’s room to sleep cuz the aircond there is freezing cold but there got longer sofa :P I use to study and sleep there when im in my high school years :P but now I am sticking to dato’s room. Much smaller like a normal room, oni got one sofa. But its ok, I manage to fit on the sofa LOL. Mum took a picture of me sleeping wat the heck ><”

While I was sleeping so soundly on my tiny sofa, I had a dream. I dreamt tat I saw andrea!!! For some reason I was back in my high school. There were classes going on. All the classes changed. I tink it became bigger and there were more classes up on the highest floor. I saw my class 5 cengal omg I cried la. Cuz I miss high school so much. Memories shared wif all my frenz ;) then I tink it was recess time. Wahliao traffic jam la. I looked down and there she was, andrea!! Omg I shouted on top of my lungs la. She saw me and she rushed to the stairs. I oso run la, run down then we met on the 1st floor or something. Wahliao, hugging and crying at the same time. She looked soooo different. She didn’t have her long straight hair anymore, short hair. Her face wasn’t tofu smooth, it had pimples everywhere. Her dressing wasn’t as nice as b4, normal yet simple. I miss her sooo much!!! I cant even start telling u how much I missed her. Each time I wanna look for her in her house she stops me. I really dunno wats going on wif her ;(

My dream was interrupted by how ee’s sms. Lol. It was urgent so its ok. If not I will scold la hahahaha. i received upsetting news ;( shits happen to great ppl. I dun understand how to world works rite now. I’ll stop here. Im getting way ahead of myself rite now…

dim sum and my sense of directions

slept quite late last nite. about 3am. i was up toking to brodie the whole nite on msn, as well as shortie pagan and cutie courtney. maybe we dun have as much tings to tok about compared to pag n court but its ok. they knew each other for more than half a year so dun compare :)

guys very clever to sweet tok rite? brod has a sweet mouth. but the ting is, when the ex comes into the picture, tings dun become crystal clear rite? daphene is his ex and i really wish i didnt care about her but she keeps coming into his life, trying to get him back :( cn ask the dad to tok for her somemore. sigh...why does an ex oways have to be in all the relationshipz i have had? it sux. u never noe when u have tat person until u get that person. ok tats confusing :/

went for dim sum tis morning. couldnt wake up to even go to the markets. i had to drive to kl. yes, i drive a lot but when it comes to kl, the roads are just sooo confusing. i admit im not very good wif roads :P my aunt oso another one, bring me all those shortcuts till i oso blur liao and she dun tell me when to turn early, oways last minute at the junction as me turn when im in the wrong lane. sien dou ah. we went for dim sum in eq hotel. not tat nice for me, but uncle charlton luvs it :/ aunt's treat tis time :) ate damm a lot la. omg, we had to rest, walk around and then continue eating. i even sneaked upstairs to have some japanese food. mmm, soft shell crab roll *drool* ate till can explode ok. not farny at all.

dad drove seperately cuz he got meeting. so he drove my aunt to klcc and i followed uncle back. tim ji, halfway tru, my mum cant see and missed him. we turned instead of going str8. damm it. we're lost and guess wat!?!?! my dad din pump petrol like i told him too cuz he took my car ><" omg, red lite come up la and there wasnt a pump anywher!!! shoit!! then keep taking wrong roads cuz i didnt wear my glasses and it was raining, cant see signboards. my gosh, panic like shoit la. somemore my mum keep saying she tinks she noes the way. and when we're on one road, she say ok i noe the way. tim ji she oso blur, say take wrong road. omg, i damm piss la but i din show it out. later stress her out i cham si la. somemore i damm worried i had to push car la. red lite for fuel keeps flashing eh. then ended up dunno where in klang lama. omg, pay toll, drive up and down...keep seeing petrol station but opposite side damm it. then ended up in pantai dalam. clueless of where tat is. saw station, omg, oso opposite so dun care, no car i faste curi, go into opposite lane and go wrong direction. *phew* at least got petrol la. can get lost without worrying. lucky went out and it was near my dad's office lol. stupid rite..drove for one hour lor ok. told brod about it and he larfed so hard damm u baby ><"

baby crashed into a bush cuz i replied his msg. wahliao. my fault isit now? lucky noting la, its just a bush :) tok since afternoon till just now about 9 i tink. i saw him on webbie. omg, miss him like crap. he showed me the new fone he got. not really new. its the lg 990 touch screen. say its mine =.=" why would i wan his fone. not mine to keep. he told me about daphene reminding him about things. really wanna make me slap her ><" told him i was sorri i had to leave him for 2.5 mths. he say its ok cuz we have the next 80 years to see each other?!?! wat does tat mean :P

anyways, time to sleep. coughing my lungs out omg. im dying soon. damm it ><"

eat eat eat...shop shop shop...yay

ive put aside all the sad and idiotic tings tat happened btw me and rave. its over and im glad it is. she isnt someone who is trust worthy and not someone who would be a good fren. im glad its ova. dun wanna have anyting to do wif her anymore. im happy where we are.

so now lets tok about me. huahuahua. i have been eating non stop since i gt back. indian, japanese, korean, chinese, western...OMG!! tomolo somemore got dim sum branch in eq hotel. just came back from 88 and im stuffed!!! seafood gallore my gosh. like i said, ive gained weight oredi and YES i noe tat cuz i stepped on the bloody scales. not farny ok!! later baby dun wan me anymore how? lolx...

shopping. YES! my fav!! ive been shopping and eating equally as much. i changed the outfits for the sg wedding in jan. i bought totally new stuff thx to jam. he kept introducing me to new stuff and i was like omg, i like tis and tat. i ended up buying most of the stuff he showed me. i took out rm600 from my bank and i have nth left at all. my mum even gave me rm350 last week. tat one oso gone. so now, all my money tat i had in my wallet all gone la. dunno buy wat so much. i saw this blue summer dress the other day, i didnt have enuf cash wif me. din wanna sign cuz mum sure scold so i told the lady, if by monday i come back and its still there, i'll buy it for sure. muahahaha...*prays its still there*

went to sp today. had lunch in 3jc restaurant wif mum n aunt. for the first time ever, i meant ever!!! i didnt buy anyting...no wait, all 3 of us didnt buy ANYTING! wat angels we were hehehehe. i went and checked out some basketball shirts for baby. dun feel like getting him tat cuz he has a cupboard FULL, i mean FULL of them. my god, more than my clothes la ><" wanted to get him a wallet but he got a new one oredi. aiya, how jek. i tink i'll get him polo tshirts instead. must make him wear more charming stuff instead of bball shirts all the time ><"

mum n aunt went jewellery shopping cuz aunt got bonus. wanted to go PYT but mum say go check out the hk gems in ss2, haven been there b4 mah. i wanted a diamond ring but mum say i too many rings oredi lolx. so she bought me a white gold one. simple yet normal. told baby about it. farny the conversation. anyways, im too tired to type. good nite world, waking up to the smell of dim sum *drool*

everyting starts wif someting :)

Yes, I am finally attached. I didn’t wanna keep my options open any longer. I am not desperate, I just really feel tat tis is rite. I was putting my choices out between 3 pp but I am not any longer. Im wif brodie and he is such an angel (for now tat is). Everyone is an angel when they first get into a relationship. Agree?!?! I shall refer him as ‘baby’ cuz tats wat I call him most of the time.

How we met u ask? The most ridiculous way anyone can ever meet, randomly on facebook. Yes, the power of FB. Amazing isn’t it. Funniest part was, pagan (baby’s bro) found me first. And I dunno how, brodie was the one who got in contact wif me. We’ve known each other for more than a mth oredi. We speak omost everyday, at first I didn’t wanna tok to him voice to voice but one day I just decided tat ok, maybe its time I reveal myself. He omost got a heart attack when I picked up his calls. Its oways msn, FB, sms or emails. Never calls. He reckons I have a very cute voice which I doubt tats true. Fyi, baby is an asian FREAK. He has a ting for Asians, no matter wat sort, Chinese, vietz, philipinoz or whatever.

Now, there are lots of drama before we actually got together. His birthday is 29^th of November. He kept insisting tat I go for his birthday party but I told him I cant (I really couldn’t). lets tok about the drama. Baby has been single for 9 mths before he met me. He likes tis gal (his ex) and she moved to Sydney. She told him to move over to be wif her and he agreed. Now now, tis is wat I said…’WHAT THE FARK???’ are u kidding me or sometin? But he told me he likes me and wanna be wif me. Now wait a minute, am I ure fling?? I told him I will never be anyone’s rebound or fling. I wan a relationship, a proper one dude.

We ended up arguing for the first time, even b4 getting together. I wanted to cry because I was lost, I din noe where I stood in his heart and mind. Everyone else just wasn’t in my mind at all. Just lost in my own lil jezzie’s world. So I told him, its either me or her, Sydney or perth, u cant hav both and I wont allow tat. And I dun care if u are gonna be single b4 u move to Sydney next june. Me or HER!

We met up for the first time on the 28^th of nov. he arranged for the meet which I find tat cute cuz he never does any plannings and I hate it. He seemed very nervous. Trust me on tat. Ive never seen any guys being so nervous when they are wif me. Too cute. When I saw him, I just felt happy. Oh and he cut and shaved. Clean look rather than the disgusting long hair and beard tat he had b4. Lots of piercings, one on his eye brow, one on right ear, 2 on left, one newly put in nipple piercing and the ever so hot tongue bar. He got his nipple done just cuz I said I find tat really HOT!! He took me out to morley. I didn’t eat cuz I was full from the steamboat and so he had waffles and we went for a movie instead of going to the beach in the middle of the nite. He paid for everyting. He was very nice, but very nervous at the same time. Too cute!

On my way home, he sms me asking if he was nervous. HELL YEA!! He said tat he was because he wanted to kiss me the moment I stepped out of the car. Haha, I find tat very farny. I never believe tat cuz it was a bit stupid if I did. So I called him a chicken LOL. I met him on Sunday again, cuz he say he wanted to see me before I leave perth. Ok lor, I went and meet him after work. I needed to borrow his body board anyways. I went to his house, into his room. Yes, I very daring rite? Ppl say I am. Wats wrong wif tat? Its just a room ppl. Not a dungeon LOL. Now, about his room, I never wanna leave it lor….omg I luv his bed!!!!! Or maybe I shd say I LUV his pillows!! He has 16 pillows of diff sizes. Now let me tell u one ting, I have a craze for pillows. Omg so soft and his blankie, the best ive been under LOL.

Before going to his house we went for lunch at chatterz. Oh, he has blue eyes btw. Now again, I am crazy for blue eyes!! I did ask him once if I could stare into his eyes without him blinking cuz I luv luv blue eyes. So he say ok, lets play a staring game. Who blink who loose. Wahliao, the whole time during lunch he couldn’t stop looking at me la. Like I oways catch him staring at me. He asked me why I choose this hair tis colour bla bla bla. I told him tat many ppl say I look good like tat so I kept it tis way lor instead of the fringe like one.

We played the staring game from the restaurant till back to his room. He came so close at one point and he kissed me. Cheater rite tat idiot. LOL. I never kissed someone for quite a long time lor ok. I cant begin to tell u wat kissing him is like. Hehehe. Lets not get into too much details. Wat happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom. I stayed there for quite a while, we watched a movie and I went back after dinner.

Baby knocked himself out during work on Tuesday L I rushed to his house immediately la. Worried sick about him man. Got there and he was like omg, so sam tung la. Icing his head and forehead L I stayed there overnite. Seriously I dam sam tung. He had headaches tru out the whole day and nite L even wif all tat pain, he didn’t stop himself from making me happy. He didn’t want me to worri or feel upset but yet he refused to take panadol. He has never ever taken a drug, not even a panadol for heaven sake. Damm annoyed wif him la but then again, its his choice. Tings happened tat nite and like I said, not everyting shd be told on blogs LOL.

I had to leave on Wednesday cuz I haven pack anyting yet. I left him in the afternoon after lunch. Then he came and pick me up at 7 to go to the airport. Omg, tat was the time I wish I never left perth. if I were to know him way earlier, I wouldn’t have booked my flight so early, nor will I go back for sooo long. I had the best pre-departure moments wif him ever. Never ever had it wif anyone else. I felt sooooo needed and luved for the first time. I can just see it in his eyes tat he wished I didn’t have to go. We were alone up on the observation deck. I didn’t wanna let him go, I didn’t wanna stop hugging him. he left me one hour before my flite cuz he has a basketball game.

I miss him like crazy now. I sms him everyday. My dad is so gonna kill me when he sees how much he has to pay for my hp bill. I told my parents about him and it wasn’t a pretty site. My mum kept objecting. Why? Cuz he is WHITE damm it!! I dun care, I am an ang mo freak LOL and I am gonna be wif him until he dump me :P he bought me a necklace as a farewell gift but I din bring it wif me. It’s a pearl surface pendant wif chain. It read’s ‘love’ in Chinese. He told me tat he isn’t going to Sydney anymore. Part of me is doubting that and another part of me noes he wont be going anywhere. He said tat he would wait for me to return in 2.5 mths time. Interesting. If I pick up a French man on my way, he will fly over and kick him in the nuts LOL. Funniest bit was this, he said tat he allows gals to hit on me but he cant stand seeing other guys wif me. He claims me as his women. Which I luv the sound of tat. Oh u shd see how Audrey interrogated him the other nite over dinner. Anyways, this entry is too long adi. Im stopping now. If u wanna noe more, u can ask me and I’ll tell u. how long will tis relationship last I dunno but im hoping for a long lasting and happy relationship.

baby called

when a girl is quiet, there are like a million tings running inside her mind...
when a girl isnt quarelling wif u, she is tinking very deeply about it...
when a girl looks at u wif her eyes filled wif questions, she is wondering...
when a girl lays on ure chest, she wants u to be hers forever...
when a girl wants to see u everyday, she wants to be pampered...
when a girl says 'i luv u', she means it from the bottom of her heart...
when a girl says 'i miss u', no one in this world can miss u more than tat...
find a guy who calls u beautiful n not HOT...
who calls u back when u hung up on him...
who will stay awake just to watch u sleep...
wait for the guy, who kisses u on ure forehead...
who holds ure hands in front of all ure frenz...
who is constantly reminding u of how much he cares about u and how lucky he is to have u...

ok, baby tried calling me since i came back but he couldnt. we have been sms-ing ever since. yes, my bill, every hour at least 10 sms. u do the maths.

'im going to make u never wanna leave perth again...'
'hard not to tink about u, i tink about u all day n al nite..'
'craig came into my room n said its ok, cheer up, i noe u miss her...he's making tings worse cuz it keeps reminding me of u...'
'last msg for the nite, i luv u wif all my heart baby. i wanna be wif u forever and ever..'

mooshy msges rite? I LUV IT! keep them coming baby mwahz...

i noe why he couldnt call me b4, he didnt dial 0011!! told him to get the idd call card hopefully he does then i'll be hearing more from him :D we tok for hours just now. i miss him so much, his voice :( :( i did have teary eyes cuz i really wanna go back. 2.5 months ok, tats like forever!! its been 4 days since i left and he said it felt like 4 weeks! it felt sooo good to hear his voice..im longing for his touch. he said tat he would pay for my ticket if i go back now hahaha. farny baby, as much as i want to, i wont, i am going to europe :) now, hopefully tings didnt change btw me and rave. hmmm.....doubt tat now :(

miss u so much brodie :( mwahs...

continue from previous post

went over the aud's place on monday because we planned to go to the beach. she invited me and brod for dinner wif sean tat nite. hmm, sean wasnt too happy cuz me and val were going as well. im pretty sure he oni wanted aud alone :P we went to cottesloe :D didnt go to the usual spot, we went somewhere where there wasnt anyone. omg, super windy and bad place to sun tan or play wif water. the sand were blowing so strong tat we were all covered in sand ><>

baby picked me up from home to go to freo for the dinner. took my car hahaha cuz i really dun wanna sit his car if given the choice :P went to ouback jacks then went to armano for gelato. aud and val interogated him and itwas funny. i never encountered tings like tis before hehe. first time. baby held my hands in public for the first time. i wasnt use to it cuz my past relationship, we didnt hold hands in public at all. i just didnt allow it to happen. val wasnt approving of our relationship, i guess she tinks tat he is a bad influence for me. well, i am thankful i have frens like tat really. but i noe wat im doing and i wanna make it rite wif tis one. no one, i mean no one has made me feel like myself, like a woman ever! he did it and im very happy he found me :)
went home and the whole trip in the car i didnt wanna let his hands go. i asked him who am i to him and i got the answer :) :) :) the rite answer. we spent hours outside my house toking and cuddling. we watched the alignment of jupiter and the moon or someting, the smiley face effect. i wish i could just go back to his place for the nite.

i left on wednesday and here i am in kl now. im glad to be home, but at the same time, i wish i was in perth :(

kelf n how ee stopped by my place when i came back. they went shopping without meeeee *sob sob*. suppose to go the nine west warehouse sale in ampang the next day but didnt. i got stuck in the jam for 1/2 hour omg! piss me off la really. so we ended up going to one u to catch a movie and do some shopping. watched transporter 3 *weeeeeeeeeeeeeee* good show good show. jason statham....HAWTNESS!!!!!!!! omg, his body and his voice *fainted*. then we went home and then i had to rush again cuz got dinner wif the gang :D picked ryan up and went to pantai seafood centre. omg, super farny la in the car, kelf super high LOL LOL. a bit freaky la actually. the nite was good i shd say. food wasnt good but company was great. it was sorta for kelf's farewell and sorta a mini gathering of ol time frenz :) went to ktz wif how ee, kelf and ryan after tat. HILLARIOUS!! all sorta bullcrap oso tok, larf so loud la my gosh. larf non stop those kind. geez, quota overused ><"

went for dim sum wif kelf n ryan the next morning. went to jin xuan hk dim sum place in DJ. eh, good dim sum man. another round of funnyness cuz kelf had some actions going wif the waiters, specifically ONE waiter. LOL hillariouz betul!! nonstop larfing and eating. seriously good food i tell u. i will definately go back there again *wootwoot* highly recommended, much better then the crap they serve in taman megah and ss2 :D :D :D be ready to pay for the price but its totally worth it hehe. kelf'z treat hahaha.

went to 1u after tat to buy some jewellery. man love in action MUAHAHAHA!!! wanted to watch bolt 3d but full, wanted to watch madagascar 2 oso full, then body of lies too front, and other shows all oso cannot so balik kampung lor. at nite dinner wif how ee and kelf. ryan ffk us HMPH! sui chai. i tink he had enuf of us oredi hahaha. went to one noodle for some ramen *YUMM* very worth it the thai seafood ramen. got mussels, scallops on shell, lala, and lotsa big prawns...forn rm15 it was damm worth it. my treat tat nite. since kelf leaving adi so sad. he's in turkey now, but we oredi plan to meet up on the 15th of jan just before i leave for sg and he leaves for nz. everyone is working so i'll be bored to death hahaha. time faste fly pls, i wanna go back to perth.

aah, im tiredddd and i miss baby

rite then, i haven been blogging since after 305 exam. now tats not typical of me to do. there's so much to update but then i'll cut it like really really really short!

after exam we went for bbt, julz n neo ffk us :( we played 'police and murderer' and heart attack. bad idea bending forward onto the table and drinking bbt and playing heart attack at the same time. i could just throw up rite there and then. i had to rush home to grab clothes, change and zoom out to aud's place to go down to the city to meet up wif carol, aud's high school fren who is now a junior SIA air hostess. we initially planned to go to hana bbq for dinner but we tot we were going clubbing after tat so cant eat that much. so we op for kimchi house instead. the food wasnt tat good and soju is disgusting everyone. its sooo hard to drink but now i noe from ryan tat its easier to drink if u mix it wif redbull or some fizzy drink. good one :) wanted to go clubbing but all clubs CLOSED!! damm idiot. just when i feel like shaking my arse hehe. so we brought carol to the xxx shop. omg i haven been in there for agez and the tings they have in there, woot woot. very interesting. new stuff everywhere. then when i walked out to acc val, this stupid ol fella tot i was one of those strippers or someting and asked if i was on a break. wth! stupid, then we went back to hilton and had a good conversation wif carol about SIA. fun and exciting man.

slept ova at aud's. very uncomfortable cuz we were sleeping on the floor and our stomaches werent feeling well at all. bad sleep. then i had and slite argument wif brodie tat morning. wasnt too happy about it. i omost cried toking to him. forget about tat bit. we went out for brekkie wif neo n romey and headed to the city to grab ingredients for the steamboat cum bbq tat nite. then we went to the korean shops and the place where neo work to get seafood. after tat we decided to go to the beach. we drove omost 1 hour to dunno where and finally we found a beach in coogee. its called c.y.oconnor beach. interesting man. so far away but the beach was bad. there wasnt anyone there. the sand was black and it sticks to ure body. not good not good. went to tom's for the dinner. good company + good food = good nite. had singsta session n heart attack session as well la. couldnt finish the food so op for lunch the next day.

went for the job meeting the next morning and got lost in the city. freaking annoying. i had getting lost especially in the city. boi i felt so stupid and tats when i really needed a GPS system.went for 2nd round of lunch and decided to go city wif aud and val. cuz i couldnt find a bloody parking in the city after being stuck on the road for agez, i decided to just leave and go meet brodie :) asked him to meet me earlier hehehe. yes, first meeting wif a stranger, im daring rite? we went for gelare and then watched a movie. his eyes were just amazing. and he couldnt stop toking and asking questions. i'll tok about him more in the next blog entry.

i continue part 2 some other day ok. im dead tired oredi. toking to ppl on9 is quite tiring especially when u haven had enuf sleep lately ><